:: Baby is not babe December 11, 2009Posted by Minci 先生 in 455176.
Not wishing to brag.. but I do look young for my age. Being short is one thing, Im also (alhamdulilah.. ) blessed with childlike facial features. While it makes any womans heart flutter in excitement when people compliment on their young complexions.. having a ‘baby face’ does have its disadvantages. Namely;
- until the staff in your ward knows you well as the MD working there, you will then be thought to be a child fiddling with other patients case note
- the sensors on the automatic door SOMETIMEs cannot ‘sense’ your presence. you end up having to jump in front of the door or wave your arm to ‘open sesame’. Is an image of Buzz Lightyear and Buddies in Toy Story 2 conjured in your mind already? The doors in A&E are dat cruel.
- baby means small. hence, you are technically physically ‘disabled’. It takes way too much energy to push the ward trolley around and please lah.. dont seksa me to bring the crippled fat man with a femur fracture on a troller and traction down for Xray.
- high school thugs wolf-whistle at you. like.. OMG..
- no one dares to date you for fear of being called a lolita fan
- some people just finds it hard to take you seriously because you’re too Peter Pan-ish
you just forgot that you’re all grown up. *sigh*
I should be friends with Linda Onn. I love her home. I want to make mine look like a resort as well. but that’ll mean slaving myself for a few years more. Ha ha.
:: Malas fikir tajuk November 25, 2009Posted by Minci 先生 in 455176.
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Most of the time.. the people you love doesnt necessarily love you back. Vice versa. Anyway, putting that aside.. I am overjoyed for 2 happy little joys of the world.
One, I get to go to a 3-day course next month. Its like .. WOW.. I never get to go to these sort of things and the topic is super duper interesting. Its on leprosy. Kinda reminded of the young Che Guevara in Motorcycle Diaries.
Number two, I received a lovely therapeutic package laden with aromatic shower foams and balm. Like wahhhhhhhhhhh… I just heart that smell of lemongrass. Yes, I mentioned some time ago about how I missed using that Boots shower foam and tadaaaaaa.. my good friend was so kind to send me one. terima kasih terima kasih. Sangat rajin me-marinate diri skrang dengan sabun. Huhu
Well.. the two doses of happiness should get me going for at least another 2 days. Then, I’ll have to find others fuels of happiness. *sigh* And it aint gonna involve engaging in any sort of human contact with people Im reluctant to.
:: Empowered November 21, 2009Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
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Last night I got to know that a fellow female colleague passed her Part 1 MRCS exams. And all this done during her current job now as a houseman. I couldnt help ‘wow’ing. I admire women, especially those in my age range who knows what they want to do with their lives. Those who are driven to achieve their own dreams and will stop on no account to achieve it. Kudos!
And today I woke up feeling quite empowered. Yes, my heart is still in pieces but realising that there are other eligible and worthwhile, undiscovered gentlemen out there, I thought its best to again, put me first. On top of my own pedestal of life.
Ninja turtles was on TV but my mind was wandering to the opportunities and dreams that I’ve always thought Id like to live for. Material wise, I still want my Dad’s car. Ha ha. But I wanted more out of life. This is not the time to jump into the Rajang river yet. :)
When I decided to come work here, my reasons were;
Just so I wouldnt have to live on the same land as my-ex. Sorrylah babe, its the type of feeling victims get when they see their rapist. Lol. Im not saying that I got raped though.
I wanted to explore Borneo before I go back to where my family is
Rekindle the relationship with my cousins and relatives. Dont think its progressing that well anyway.
Possibly to make my parents happy by fishing for a guy who is from our hometown. not much luck in that aspect as well. buggers.
To polish on my mediocre Mandarin
Determine a specialty that I might be interested to get involved in
So Im still empowered and went to visit my favourite hanging out place – MPH. With SPeedy being my 2nd best place. And Toilet as the 3rd. Ha ha ha.
And I bought 2 books. I couldnt help it. they were calling for me to buy them. ‘Minci.. beli saya…beli saya”
One is ‘How to be like women of power’. Hah.. ambik kau.. and second, ‘Keeping my Mandarin alive’ by Lee Kuan Yew. Yes, this is the man who runs a country 24hours a day and yet he still have time to learn language at the age of 32 and Hokkien at 38. Surely , me only at 26 could do farely as well, kan?
huwargh. semangat2. Then maybe I can decide whether to go the line of MRCPCH, FRCA or public health? ga ga ga..
:: Miss November 15, 2009Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
I miss performing. I miss being on stage singing a song, reciting a poem, playing a part in a play and dancing to a song. I miss the moment of being able to read a good book while your hands running through the hair of your loved one. OK, the last part.. I lied. Ha ha.. delusional.
I miss going to an old library with lots and lost of books. I miss the smell of unopened books. That ‘clever’ smell. The texture of old book covers. The ones yang berjilid.
I miss my glorious domestic moments of being able to host a tea party. To be able to bake a cake in a blink of an eye. My cupboard used to be complete with all sorts of baking ingredients and ‘food accessories’! My apron was forever smelling of pastry and ‘hard work’. I miss those times when tea and coffee means NOt Instant.Not 3 in One.
I miss being able to just get out of the house at night and gaze at the stars with the soft wind blowing at your face. Here? Theres no privacy if I want to do that. People would wonder why and want to make conversations. Well, dont. Leave me alone. Leave me to just spend time with the stars and the moon.
Above all, I miss my happy self.
If I do get to go on this little road trip I have in mind, I am so going to write a book about self discovery and get it published. OK, the last part.. itu namanya angan2 minah jenin. Either way, its going to be called….
Healing the littlehealer.
:: Indie November 14, 2009Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
I suppose most typical, retarded guys tend to leave us girls when they feel that they are redundant. Of no use. Perhaps it is part of my mistake to freely proving to the world that I am one woman who can stand on her two feet. Though small in size but still standing. Atypical guys should know better that no matter how tough a woman puts up her front, no matter how much she denies the fact that she doesnt need a man to make her happy… he knows best that at the end of the day, she is still a woman longing for that attention and care from her dearest. Kekasih gelap sekalipun mengimpikan kasih sayang yang melimpah ruah biarpun berkata ‘i dun mind being second’.
And why shouldnt I lead my life as I wish? Father wanted his two daughters to grow up as independent women and I suppose he as a man knows for himself of what men are capable of doing to hurt his daughters.
And now having spent 26 years on the face of this earth, I am proud to say that I have been financially independent of my parents ever since I started the first year of medical school. I lived solely on my scholarship money and I needed more, I WORKED in that foreign country for that extra cash. And that is on a minimum wage I tell you. Whatever money my parents gave after that was more of a gift – hari raya money etc. Though I had to borrow some money from PAMA when I transfered here to work, I am still paying them back. Every single cent.
Going back a few years, Independence has been grilled in me since primary school. I would participate in competitions that requires me to compete in alien surroundings only in the company of my teachers. I had to learn to be apart from my parents at a tender age, learning how to live under the care of another guardian – my teacher.
Later on in secondary school, I had to learn and do some trials and errors in establishing techniques on how to avoid myself from getting bullied by seniors. On how to live among friends. To which I realized that ‘friends are family we choose for ourselves’.
Subsequently, I had to face numerous life lessons (and Im sure we all do at one point in time) in order for me to maintain Independent. The topic of my life lesson now is still under the big umbrella of ‘Adulthood’. Im forced to learn about relationships between people and the ‘politics’ of life. Things get a bit trickier when now I know I have power and money. Plus … Will. Wakaka.. bunyi macam jahat je.
Beware of scorned women with money. Gawd. How did I end here.. I was going to write about this solo road trip Im taking next month. :P
:: Bukan wanita mulia November 11, 2009Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
Lama jugaklah kiranya aku menunggu penjelasan tapi nampaknya kau tiada kesedaran mahupun sifat kemanusiaan. Suka ya nk biar aku tergantung macam nih tak bertali. oh wait.. kau nk simpan tali tuh untuk jerut leher sendiri ke?
Maaflah. Aku bukan wanita mulia. So aku harap kau pergi mampus dan if its not that difficult , I demand an apology before you do.
Aku masih menanti tapi aku rasa kau akan tetap dengan cara kau. Haih. Sakitnya otak aku.
:: A workaholic is born today November 9, 2009Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
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Women Workaholics are born when the emotional void needs to be filled…
Malam nih aku nak singgah wad. isi logbook cantik2.
Malam nih aku perlu makan nasi. Sudah 3 hari tak makan beras. Malam nih aku perlu berada di dalam lingkungan manusia agar jiwa tidak kacau.
As of tomorrow night, I will find a cause. A humanitarian cause that I can devote my love and life to.