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:: Cold Feet At Wedding August 7, 2007

Posted by Minci 先生 in Dream Diary.
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You thought you love the guy and your heart jumped when he asked you to marry him. Without thinking twice, you said ‘Yes’ and as the time for the big day drew nearer, you begin to have cold feet. Calling it off or just disappearing would both break his heart and you wonder, which would be the less hurtful option.

A few hours before my wedding, I had cold feet. Yup. Thank goodness it was just a dream but if felt so real that I thought I’d be living a life of misery once we’re pronounced husband and wife.

Here’s how it all started.
Because of the nature of my work (which I don’t know what) I have to travel a lot. However, I’d always leave my stuff at this one place – a place resembling a barber shop and the owner was someone I recognize from real life. He’s one of the cashiers at Woo Sang. (a chinese shop in Manchester)

But no, my groom to be was not him. My so called groom was a Caucasian. His name was Derek (apakah? ala2 Grey’s Anatomy plak) but not as cute as McDreamy. I knew Derek. I’ve seen him before in real life but I can’t remember who he is anymore. I guess the closest person that you could describe him physically was Paul Potts. So let’s take his form as Paul Potts. Imagine people imagine.

 Paul Potts

Maybe it was because I see him everyday and interact with him most of the time that made my feeling grew on him. Derek was cashierman’s friend. How they knew each other, I have no idea.

One day, for some reason all of us were in the jungle. Derek, Me, cashier and other Malay guys whom I don’t remember. It was raining and we were in our tents. I’m in mine, him in his. Our tents were very close to each other. The gap is probably just sejengkal. All of a sudden, he peered from beneath his tent and popped THE QUESTION, “Minci, will you marry me?”

Without thinking twice, I said ‘yes’ and everyone there in the jungle was happy for us. Including Tarzan.

As quickly as it all happened, the dream now took place in Manchester . I know that because we were in Piccadilly Gardens near the Metrolinks. It is this time when reality began to sink in but being a mouse, I didn’t know how to express my doubts.

I was introduced to his whole family who accepted me as one of theirs with open arms. His mom said that we should have the wedding as soon as possible for Derek loves me like no other.

(gambar hiasan)

The word wedding doesn’t seem to make me happy anymore for only now do I realize that one big barrier between us. I’m a Muslim, he’s a Christian. (oo.. in this dream, I was not wearing a hijab by the way). I wondered if he’d forgotten that big fact. This must stop, so I dropped in a hint.

“Baby,” (ambik kau..aku panggil Paul Potts lookalike ‘baby’ ) ” You do know that I’m a muslim, right? And I’ll be doing muslim stuff like praying and things?”

” Yea, I do. just do them. I don’t mind.. I LOve you”

Aduhhh.. luluh pliss. Mengapakah aku boleh jatuh hati pada ini manusia. Oh.. its because Derek’s nice and sweet. Still, I felt this cannot go on. Furthermore, my parents doesn’t know about it yet. Therefore, there were so many reasons as to why I was having cold feet.

1. Dont know Derek long enough (relatively) to convince my parents that I really do love him. Or maybe it was more like convincing myself. I mean just how much can you know about a guy in a dream?

2. Different religion/faith

3. Too early. In a hurry. Rushing into things. Express!

4. Loving someone else (‘still’ or affair)

5. Major differences in age, social upbringing – Yea.. Derek’s probably in his 40s and I’m in my 20s. He’s from England, I’m from Malaysia. Hmph..

6. No close friends and family to support my decision – to tell me or advise me if this is the right thing to do. Or maybe help call it off? heh.. 😛

I thought conversion to Islam would put him off, hence ‘I’m saved’ but Derek embraced his new faith with an open heart. I remember (in my dream) he had tears of joy in his eye as he declared himself as a Muslim. Now, how could I break this man’s heart after such a huge act of love? By then, I knew I had cold feet not because of Reason No 2 but more of Reason No 4.

I still havent informed my parents and doing this is equally agonizing. The wedding was in a few hours and I was hoping that with my parents saying ‘NO’, I have a solid reason to call it off but this was easier said than done. It was like being caught between the devil and the deep blue sea. I keep punching the numbers 1886600603********. I hear my mum at the end of the line but I couldn’t pluck up that courage to tell her.

‘Hello.. hello’ I hear my mum say. I remained silent, not knowing how to start off telling this shocking news.

She hung up. I tried again. This time my dad answered and it was enough to send my heart beating really fast. I felt dizzy and light-headed. I couldnt do it. I can’t tell them but I can’t tell Derek too. I hung up and just stared down at the floor. I felt alone. What was I to do? I was already in my bridal gown, complete with a veil. Was it a church? I have no idea. Everything is so mixed up.

‘How do I get out of this mess? This is just too weird.. how could this happen to me?’ I somehow got the idea that this is all a dream. I convinced myself that it was a dream and boy  was I relieved to discover that it definitely was the tricks of the mind. I am happy that it was a dream after all. What a nightmare.

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Comments»

1. D - August 7, 2007

My, my… you’re not pressured, are you, girl?

2. Puteri Nad :-) - August 7, 2007

kekekek
ur dream is sure weird yet full of details!
i like
2

where as nad malam tadi mimpi berebut surat khabar je

3. hafiz - August 7, 2007

that is quite a long dream

4. daju - August 7, 2007

yeah it’s long..
pnah gak dream someone masok meminang..
klakar..the settings was in my room in States..
tetibe parents dia dtg..and i was crying gile2..
not sebab happy but confused..hoho..

5. Danial - August 7, 2007

hihihi…
what a dream…
then hopefully u have a nicer and better dream than dis one. hoho

6. jet - August 7, 2007

siyesly, kalu org ajak kite kawen, bape kali kite kne piker?bole x men kawen je dgn org yg kita x knal?ape firasat kamu yg berpengalaman melalui mimpi?

7. Zy - August 7, 2007

yah..kak minci sik basuh kaki sblm tido..hehe

8. Puteri Nad :-) - August 7, 2007

ha boleh kot men kawen je jet..
mcm kalo dalam mimpi kan peduli ape..

9. Syafrizal - August 7, 2007

It’s just a dream. I got worse than that and it puzzles me sometime.

10. Minci - August 7, 2007

Kak D,
pressured? Of? Haha.. but then its jes a dream

nad,
dreams with details dont come that often.. I realized that i had to make an effort to remember it once I wake up.. barulah ingat bebetul

hafiz,
it looks long sbb i gi campur tulis my emotions and everything. 😛

daju,
oh.. pernah mimpi like this oso…well..kita kan di usia ‘laku’.. haha

danial,
oh.. if only i cud choose my dream

jet,
dia ikut kau ok.. kekadang tkyah fikir pun tkper.. 😈

zy,
tuh lah.. next time I shud rendam my feet before i schleep

nad,
ah jet. ikut kata nad ni hah

syafrizal,
oooo.. i wonder how worse

11. jet - August 7, 2007

oh..adekah blog daju dah menjadi protected sekarang?ke aku yang bangang?

12. adiratna - August 8, 2007

All that you need is not to decide. Not to chose Derek nor some one else. All you have to do is

To
Get
Yourself
An

ALARM CLOCK!!!

Harggghh! It’s already 9.

13. Minci - August 8, 2007

Jet,
oh.. aku rasa aku pun bangang skali kot.. sbb tkleh nk masuk jugak.. dia terus sampai ke ompej wordpress kan..

adiratna,
i got oredi.. my alarm clock kan.. ada bunyi ROOSTER.. ibarat bangun di kampung sajorr.. indah dan permai

14. xazuru - August 8, 2007

buat per pilih yg jauh2? sini ada satu melayu!!! teheeehee

15. baez - August 8, 2007

dis is so kelakar
motif sgt mimpi dikau begitu boley
penoh ngan detail bak kata nadbintik
daku tak pernah mimpi detail
except mimpi kene kejar pisau kek
lambang gambar dikau lonjong

16. Puteri Nad :-) - August 8, 2007

hahah penipu
dikau ada beberapa lagi mimpi detail

17. Minci - August 8, 2007

xazuru,
*buat2 tak nampak*

baez,
padan ok padan.. ejek lagi gambar lonjong tuh.. miahaha

nad,
really? kalbatlah to me 😛

18. kaSyah - August 10, 2007

takutnya… 😛


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