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November 29, 2009

Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
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I should be friends with Linda Onn. I love her home. I want to make mine look like a resort as well. but that’ll mean slaving myself for a few years more. Ha ha.

Enough said.

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:: Empowered November 21, 2009

Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
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Last night I got to know that a fellow female colleague passed her Part 1 MRCS exams. And all this done during her current job now as a houseman. I couldnt help ‘wow’ing. I admire women, especially those in my age range who knows what they want to do with their lives. Those who are driven to achieve their own dreams and will stop on no account to achieve it. Kudos!

And today I woke up feeling quite empowered. Yes, my heart is still in pieces but realising that there are other eligible and worthwhile, undiscovered gentlemen out there, I thought its best to again, put me first. On top of my own pedestal of life.

Ninja turtles was on TV but my mind was wandering to the opportunities and dreams that I’ve always thought Id like to live for. Material wise, I still want my Dad’s car. Ha ha. But I wanted more out of life. This is not the time to jump into the Rajang river yet. 🙂

When I decided to come  work here, my reasons were;

  • Just so I wouldnt have to live on the same land as my-ex. Sorrylah babe, its the type of feeling victims get when they see their rapist. Lol. Im not saying that I got raped though.
  • I wanted to explore Borneo before I go back to where my family is
  • Rekindle the relationship with my cousins and relatives. Dont think its progressing that well anyway.
  • Possibly to make my parents happy by fishing for a guy who is from our hometown. not much luck in that aspect as well. buggers.
  • To polish on my mediocre Mandarin
  • Determine a specialty that I might be interested to get involved in

So Im still empowered and went to visit my favourite hanging out place – MPH. With SPeedy being my 2nd best place. And Toilet as the 3rd. Ha ha ha.

And I bought 2 books. I couldnt help it. they were calling for me to buy them. ‘Minci.. beli saya…beli saya”

One is ‘How to be like women of power’. Hah.. ambik kau.. and second, ‘Keeping my Mandarin alive’ by Lee Kuan Yew. Yes, this is the man who runs a country 24hours a day and yet he still have time to learn language at the age of 32 and Hokkien at 38. Surely , me only at 26 could do farely as well, kan?

huwargh. semangat2. Then maybe I can decide whether to go the line of MRCPCH, FRCA or public health? ga ga ga..

:: Miss November 15, 2009

Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
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I miss performing. I miss being on stage singing a song, reciting a poem, playing a part in a play and dancing to a song. I miss the moment of being able to read a good book while your hands running through the hair of your loved one. OK, the last part.. I lied. Ha ha.. delusional.

I miss going to an old library with lots and lost of books. I miss the smell of unopened books. That ‘clever’ smell. The texture of old book covers. The ones yang berjilid.

I miss my glorious domestic moments of being able to host a tea party. To be able to bake a cake in a blink of an eye. My cupboard used to be complete with all sorts of baking ingredients and ‘food accessories’! My apron was forever smelling of pastry and ‘hard work’. I miss those times when tea and coffee means NOt Instant.Not 3 in One.

I miss being able to just get out of the house at night and gaze at the stars with the soft wind blowing at your face. Here? Theres no privacy if I want to do that. People would wonder why and want to make conversations. Well, dont. Leave me alone. Leave me to just spend time with the stars and the moon.

Above all, I miss my happy self.

If I do get to go on this little road trip I have in mind, I am so going to write a book about self discovery and get it published. OK, the last part.. itu namanya angan2 minah jenin. Either way, its going to be called….

Healing the littlehealer.

 

:: Indie November 14, 2009

Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
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I suppose most typical, retarded guys tend to leave us girls when they feel that they are redundant. Of no use. Perhaps it is part of my mistake to freely proving to the world that I am one woman who can stand on her two feet. Though small in size but still standing. Atypical guys should know better that no matter how tough a woman puts up her front, no matter how much she denies the fact that she doesnt need a man to make her happy… he knows best that at the end of the day, she is still a woman longing for that attention and care from her dearest. Kekasih gelap sekalipun mengimpikan kasih sayang yang melimpah ruah biarpun berkata ‘i dun mind being second’.

And why shouldnt I lead my life as I wish? Father wanted his two daughters to grow up as independent women and I suppose he as a man knows for himself of what men are capable of doing to hurt his daughters.

And now having spent 26 years on the face of this earth, I am proud to say that I have been financially independent of my parents ever since I started the first year of medical school. I lived solely on my scholarship money and I needed more, I WORKED in that foreign country for that extra cash. And that is on a minimum wage I tell you. Whatever money my parents gave after that was more of a gift – hari raya money etc. Though I had to borrow some money from PAMA when I transfered here to work, I am still paying them back. Every single cent.

Going back a few years, Independence has been grilled in me since primary school. I would participate in competitions that requires me to compete in alien surroundings only in the company of my teachers. I had to learn to be apart from my parents at a tender age, learning how to live under the care of another guardian – my teacher.

Later on in secondary school, I had to learn and do some trials and errors in establishing techniques on how to avoid myself from getting bullied by seniors. On how to live among friends. To which I realized that ‘friends are family we choose for ourselves’.

Subsequently, I had to face numerous life lessons (and Im sure we all do at one point in time) in order for me to maintain Independent. The topic of my life lesson now is still under the big umbrella of ‘Adulthood’. Im forced to learn about relationships between people and the ‘politics’ of life. Things get a bit trickier when now I know I have power and money. Plus …  Will. Wakaka.. bunyi macam jahat je.

Beware of scorned women with money. Gawd. How did I end here.. I was going to write about this solo road trip Im taking next month. 😛

 

:: Bukan wanita mulia November 11, 2009

Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
3 comments

Lama jugaklah kiranya aku menunggu penjelasan tapi nampaknya kau tiada kesedaran mahupun sifat kemanusiaan. Suka ya nk biar aku tergantung macam nih tak bertali. oh wait.. kau nk simpan tali tuh untuk jerut leher sendiri ke?

Maaflah. Aku bukan wanita mulia. So aku harap kau pergi mampus dan if its not that difficult , I demand an apology before you do.

Aku masih menanti tapi aku rasa kau akan tetap dengan cara kau. Haih. Sakitnya otak aku.

 

:: A workaholic is born today November 9, 2009

Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
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Women Workaholics are born when the emotional void needs to be filled…

Malam nih aku nak singgah wad. isi logbook cantik2.

Malam nih aku perlu makan nasi. Sudah 3 hari tak makan beras. Malam nih aku perlu berada di dalam lingkungan manusia agar jiwa tidak kacau.

As of tomorrow night, I will find a cause. A humanitarian cause that I can devote my love and life to.

 

:: Hazard to myself November 8, 2009

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The difficult thing about being a woman is that it naturally restricts you from travelling alone because of the risk of getting rape. Yalah.. aku dara lagi and I cannot bear my  hymen being savaged by monstrous strangers. Ouch.So, that means I cannot really exercise full use of my passport plus its not that my line of job would allow me to sesuka hati pergi ‘cuti’ kan. My passport will expire in like I think 4 years time. Must utilise it well.

 

I admit Im adventorous but iM ALSO WHAT pINK would describe as a ‘hazard to myself’. Just yesterday I rammed my car against the plastic cones at the divider.. so ladies and gentlemen, if you ever see a carplate number with a partial ‘267’ lying on the road, that’ll be mine. I had to fork 18MYR to get it fixed. haha.

If I had a membership to a gun shooting range club, Id probably be doing a few rounds shooting targets there but here in Kuching, mana ok bende2 nih sume. I dont want paintballing. I want professional shooting. I want to aim with a bow and arrow. I want to ride horses. I want to swim a few laps. I want to tone up my biceps just before I go into Surgery later semata2 untuk riak lengan masa scrub bley? And uuuuuuuhhhh.. this means its time to tone the rectus abdominis and gluteus maximus as well. Yezza. Ha ha ha.. mari gelak macam orang gila yang meroyan.

Oh. and have I mentioned that Im contemplating on getting a pixie cut AGAIn but this time BLEACH it blonde? Im in an emotional crisis. please dont mind me. Its a cyclical thing. Seems to be getting it for every 4 years in the month of  November. Cool. I was a werewolf in my last life. Now reincarnated as a confused, rebellious little spirit. Saiko-centric.

Hurm. Tabacco. Craving for it. Its been 6 years without a ciggie. complexnya kehidupan ini. I need a new environment. Few friends are going to Thailand next year. Sounds interesting. I want to dress like a little man and then suffer from Short Man Syndrome. Meroyan meroyan. Dont mind me again please. Its not the hormones talking. Its the anger that hasnt quite got its aim yet. Im still angry but the problem is he doesnt know that Im really really really mad. urgh. jantan. i am so going to write a book entitled ‘Men were never from Mars, I’ll tell you why’.

 

 

:: JUmbled up November 2, 2009

Posted by Minci 先生 in Everyday Life.
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If it werent for the thought of The End in mind.. I think I would have slept with over 5 different men right now. Hah. ambik kau. Secret Confession of a… hmmm… temptation.. temptation.. ish ish ish.

Time flies and in 1 month time.. it will be my 1st anniversary in service as a healer. LOL. I feel so old. Yet Im trapped in this childlike figure. Im a female PeterPan. Even those born in 1985 look so much more mature. On the other hand, I will forever look like a First Poster. Roar. (An attempt to sound mighty)

la la la. Im back to living in a tongkang pecah again. Its that ‘season’ of which im just not bothered to keep my habitat tidy. Hopefully with less calls this month, I may get in touch with the domestic goddess in myself and keep my little vampiric coffin spick and clean again. Huhu.

On a Michelle Phan fever